Five Fifths Culture

What is the worst part of trying to watch YouTube videos? If you answered the ads, then you're correct. If you answered something else then you're an incredibly patient human and I need to be more like you. When an ad plays, my normal routine is to scream out loud in disgust over my time being wasted and anxiously wait until I can press "skip ad". But a couple of weeks ago, while trying to watch what was more than likely a Kendrick Lamar music video, I actually watched an entire ad. The featured product was incredibly intriguing and immediately triggered so many questions for me. Here is the commercial:

After watching this, the first thing I asked was, why? Do people really find the time and effort of sprinkling seasoning on their fish, meat or poultry so exhausting that they believe it necessary to purchase seasoned pieces of paper to wrap and cook their food in? I also wondered if cooking in rolling paper for chicken is good for our health? There are probably chemicals fuming from the paper directly into your food. I just felt so many emotions: confusion, frustration, skepticism.

At the same time, these Stouffer's Seasoning Wraps are beyond comical. On an "unnecessary scale" of 1 to 10, Stouffer's Seasoning Wraps rank off the charts; comparable only to those late night "call now within the next 5 minutes to get this 18 way potato slicer for only 6 payments of $17.99!". Stouffer's even took the time to create a step-by-step guide on how to cook your chicken in seasoned paper:

My main question for people who buy and use this product is, at what point in the process do you think, "this is completely unnecessary"? For me, it was when I saw the advertising. For others, it's when they leave their house, go to the grocery store and think about the fact that they are paying 3 bucks for seasoned paper. But for the folks who actually take this into their kitchen, I wonder if they look over at their cabinet after step 1, see their seasonings, and think about how easy it would be to dash a bit of salt, pepper, garlic, Adobo, Italian seasoning, or if you're African-American, Lawry's.

I genuinely do not want us to neglect the magical parts of cooking. Food Network would get really awkward if their chefs replaced "use a pinch of salt" with "use 15 seasoned pieces of paper". Even if you are someone who believes you can not cook and will surely ruin a meal given the opportunity, learn to embrace the process. One of my favorite childhood memories is when my step-father, who could not cook at all, decided to make cornbread. My mom and I were impressed with his effort and very excited to try his creation. As soon as we took a bite, we spit the cornbread out of our mouths. My step-father and his novice cooking skills, accidentally swapped the measurements of salt and sugar making the cornbread taste like ocean water. But because we were so appreciative of him going out of his way to make us a meal, we laughed about the whole thing. Today it makes for a great story; don't rob yourself of moments like these. You too can be the Salt Bae of your own kitchen!